How to create time and space for yourself

some ideas on how to create more time and space for yourself.

It can become all too easy these days to get caught up in a hectic round of professional and social events, shopping and general commitments. Therefore, it’s all the more important to take time out for yourself, to reflect on what's working, what aspects of your life you’d like to alter, and what could be let go of. My article today is about creating the time and space to allow that to happen.

Before I became a life coach I trained as a classical pianist, and I can clearly remember the first time my College tutor asked me to consider that the silence between the notes of a piece of music was as important as the notes themselves. As a student at that time I was more interested in virtuosity; for me, the greatest number of notes in the shortest possible time was the recipe for success and applause.

As the years have passed I have come to realize that my tutor was right: timing and space create a platform for music to speak to an audience at the deepest level, and likewise in our own lives, for our own inner voices and desires to be heard and acted upon.

How many of us take time in our busy lives to really appreciate the silence between the notes? We may say that we don’t have time to slow down, that there aren’t enough hours in the day as it is; but what we need to learn is that it is we who are in control of our time, not the other way around, (though with the demands of family, friends and work – the static of obligation - this may be hard to believe at times).

It’s important to learn to go within, to prioritize our time, identify time wasters and say no to requests from others when need be. This plan to take care of ourselves first may sound selfish to some, but it’s only by looking after ourselves that we have the resources and energy to reach out to others, creating richer, more balanced and fulfilled lives.

Some suggestions for accessing space and time:

1.Sit and really listen to the world around you; notice the sounds that are close and those more distant. Become aware of the humming of the Universe, the vibration around you. If any of these sounds bothers you, the barking of a neighbour’s dog for example, aim to let the sound travel through you without giving it energy. Then turn your attention inwards, to the sounds of your body: your breath, digestion. Become aware of the constantly fluctuating rhythms of your energy. Just sit and let go. Become a human being, not a human doing.

2.In conversation, breathe before you speak: let others finish their sentence; too often we are not truly listening to the other person but are simply waiting for a chance to jump in again with our own riveting insights! Give each conversation some breathing space.

3.Focus on your breathing; relaxing into the breath, without aiming to change it in any way, can be a wonderful way to bring mind and body into alignment. A good technique suggested by Vietnamese monk Thich Nhat Hanh is to say the word 'arriving' as you breathe in, and 'home' as you breathe out. After a few minutes of this mindful breathing, you will be calmer and more in tune with yourself. Take time during each day to reconnect with your breath.

4.Get up earlier each day; so many of us rush headlong into the fray after gulping down some breakfast and fighting the traffic, already adrenalized when the day has hardly begun. The way in which we get going in the morning tends to set up the tone for the whole day. If you can, give yourself the gift of time in the morning to read, meditate or just potter about and you’ll feel the benefits (if you can go to bed earlier, so much the better!) My days are transformed when I manage to do this.

5.Just sit idly and look out of the window (this may be challenging at first, you can build up to it over time – perhaps a minute or two to start with); allow your thoughts to flit about as they will, after a while, see if you can distance yourself enough from your thoughts to observe them as they pass. Imagine them floating down a river in front of you, each one gradually disappearing out of sight.

You might like to make your own list. Remember that we function much better with some time out, and enjoy the journey inwards!

About the Author

Sarah is a business and life-design coach, working with individuals, entrepreneurs and independent professionals to support them to create more business and profitability, while designing a balanced, fulfilling and fun life.

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