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Home::All

From Angry To Loyal, All In One Understanding Minute

Author : Ken Lansford

An angry customer is one of the most dreaded moments in
business. Absolutely no business owner is immune to them no
matter how hard they try. No matter how much they do. Human
nature indicates that sooner or later a customer will get upset.
Even downright angry. So what do you do?

It's one of the toughest moments in business and the urge is to
defend yourself. Fight back. However, one simple tool will show
you that fighting back is not the answer. Fighting back fuels
the emotion and makes matters worse. The tool is understanding
what lies underneath the anger. Any psychologist will tell you
that anger is a secondary emotion. Scratch that away and you
have only two choices. The real root of the problem. Fear or
hurt. That's it. Under all that attack and all those abusive
words is the real root emotion of either fear or hurt.

Now if a friend came to you in tears, afraid or hurt, what
would you do? How would you handle it? Would you pour salt on
the wound? Would you fight back? Of course not. Compassion
dictates that you listen attentively to their feelings and
validate them. They might not be right, but at this point in
time they need to be heard, to be validated. If you can keep the
real emotion in mind, then you realize that it's not a fight,
it's a plea. In this way you can handle yourself professionally
and with a caring manner. This technique helps you understand
that it's personal only to them, no matter what they say.
However, you may have to post the words Hurt Or Afraid on your
computer monitor to remember.

The strange thing about anger is that it's rather like wolfing
your cookies. You tend to want to also. When someone comes in
for the attack, remember the underlying emotion and that all the
emotional outbursts are centered in the Limbic portion of the
brain. When a person is in the Limbic portion of their brain,
they are pure emotion, nothing else. Logical reasoning cannot
take place. This is why fighting back will not work. You must
take the higher, harder road.

Listen, talk quietly, validate, soothe. Once your customer has
calmed down, you can resolve the problem and thus the root
emotion. When you do this, your customer becomes bonded to you
in ways you won't believe. Their confidence in you triples,
their trust in you solidifies, and your future with them is
secure. Furthermore, they will sing your praises forever. All it
takes is a little understanding and you can turn an angry client
into a customer forever.

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