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Home::Glen Littlejohn

Having a Bad e MALE Day? Email, Spam, Spam and More Spam

Author : Andy Staveley

You just sat at your desk, opened your email account and what do you get? First there is some anonymous donkey from an anonymous and anything but respectable mortgage lender telling you that they can arrange your finance at 3% and all you need to do now that your application is approved is to sign along the dotted line and get in touch with them. This is despite the fact that you have never heard of them or even approached them – ever!.

Next we have luscious Lucy asking you if you remember her from when you last met. Her email tells you that she still loves you and she has sent you her personal photos just for your eyes only. Well, you certainly made the right impression there didn’t you. No, don’t click on the click on the link or the attachment……..

Just as your thoughts start to wander and you begin to imagine Lucy in her long fur coat and fish net stockings you have another email. This is one you can’t afford to miss out on. Viagra. You need viagra for Lucy. She needs you. What luck. After much deliberation you decide to pass on the viagra but no sooner have you passed it by……..whats this? someone else is there at the ready with - sildenafil citrate. Oh but hang on, doesn’t the box look the same as the one in the last email? Its viagra again. By now any thoughts of rampant fun with the luscious Lucy are becoming jaded. Just what else could be in the remaining 120 emails you have to sift through.

The next half an hour is spent sifting through emails from important people wanting to show you how to make millions on the internet and others bombarding you with products and ezines about the latest online dating clubs. Someone even wants to sell you some cut price tampax – and your male!

Finally, you are nearly there. So far you have recovered one invoice from all the emails and notification from someone asking about the return of their water filter which you are unsure about. In fact you don’t even remember their water filter. The email opens and this one is from the desk of President Mbongo Bungo Esq a Nigerian Oil Company director. This could be promising. There is talk of money. Not a few hundred or several thousand either but real money. This guy is loaded…wow…this is the one.

Or maybe not

Tip: Fed up with all the day to crap of junk mail I changed all the email addresses on my websites to forms. I set scripts on my servers that report the users directly to their ISP for abuse. Finally, all incoming mail goes into my junk box not my incoming mailbox. This makes it easy to dump all in one go. I then scan through it in less than a couple of minutes and I mercilessly trash the lot. Most people I know and deal with are on my preference list anyway.

How much is your time worth? There is something wrong with your business if you are paranoid about losing an email enquiry and having to find the time to sift through hundreds of emails. Get organised and work smart. You will be glad that you did.

From http://www.birminghamuk.com the Voice of the West Midlands..

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