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Home::Family

What I learned on family vacation

Author : Darrin F. Coe, MA

My wife, my two preschoolers, and I recently drove from Canon
City, Colorado to Readstown, Wisconsin in a 4-door dodge neon.
I’m happy to report my children are still alive. Believe it or
not this was one of the most enjoyable times I’ve experienced in
the past year. My family grew closer and I learned to experience
joy in that most exasperating of questions, “Are we there yet?”

I learned that it is better to be creative than it is to be
frustrated and angry. One of my boys would ask, “Are we there
yet?”

I would answer, “Yes, but only in our existential and ethereal
lives.” Which bought about 10 minutes of silence as they tried
to figure out what I’d just said. There was one point as we were
approaching Onowa, Iowa on our return trip at which I found
myself wanting to use every expletive I’d learned in my eight
years as a correctional professional as well as wanting to try
my hand at creating a few. The boys were tired, loud, talkative,
and only barely listening as I and my wife attempted to speak
rationally to them about shutting their mouths..

So instead of blowing a diode and risking the safety of everyone
in the car, I began to engage the boys in a question and answer
session about what they loved about our vacation to date.
Questions like, “Duncan, what three things did you like most
about spending time with greatgrandpa Gayle?” Within minutes,
both boys were chomping at the bit to answer the next question;
I was back in control, and in the process learned a great deal
about the loves, goals, and thought processes of a three and a
five year old. It turned into one of the highlights of the trip.

I learned that creativity and patience provide much more joy and
control than loud volume, and intimidation. I learned that our
family has a lot of great things to share with each other if we
take the time to get over being tired and allow even the
youngest to have their say. I learned that I too, am not immune
to threatening to “pull this car over, right now!” Finally, I
learned it is imperative to pay attention when your son tells
you he’s got a “yucky tummy” and feels like throwing up.

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