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Home::Dylan Miles
"How Internet Marketing Made Me 'Drop-Dead' Gorgeous!"
Author : Jo McNamara
"Those who know their minds do not necessarily know their
hearts." La Rochefoucauld
Internet marketing fascinates me. It fascinates me so much that
I am at the computer 12 hours a day. However, after a few months
I noticed that my posterior was beginning to spread out and fit
the contours of my desk chair a bit too comfortably. I was
getting very pale and for the first time became aware that gray
was now my natural hair color.
Action was needed and this is what I did:
Because I was getting up at 4 a.m. to be able to spend 12
hours a day on the computer, I found that I was getting hungrier
during the day. But instead of eating Fritos, I started having
boiled eggs and apples as snacks. I quit putting chips on my
grocery list. My husband complained about not having munchies in
the house. I told him if he wanted them that much, he could buy
them himself.
Because I was getting up earlier in the morning to spend 12
hours a day at the computer, I started eating my dinner earlier
in the evening. That meant my husband and I no longer had dinner
together. He started bellyaching that there wasn't anything
prepared for him when he got home from work. I told him it was
about time he learned how to cook.
Because I was spending 12 hours a day sitting in front of the
computer, I decided I needed to spend at least half an hour on
the exercise bike. So I got it out of the garage and set it up
in the living room so that I could listen to the stereo while I
exercised. My husband objected about having to look at it while
he watched TV. I told him that was too bad and HE could use some
exercise himself.
Living in Florida, I've always had a tan and I like having
some color. But because I was spending 12 hours a day on the
computer, I didn't have time to spend in the pool. So I started
using self-tanning lotion. My husband grumbled that he didn't
like having to smell it at night. I told him he could sleep in
the spare bedroom if it bothered him that much.
Sitting in front of the computer for 12 hours a day, I was
smoking cigarette after cigarette. By the end of the day I could
barely breathe; my lungs felt so heavy and congested. I decided
I would have to give up smoking. Of course, nicotine withdrawal
made me v-e-r-y irritable. My husband said he wished I would
start smoking again because I was so miserable to be around. I
told him to go to #&*%!!!
With the money I made from my e-business, I got an expensive
new hair style, bought a new wardrobe (in a much smaller size),
traded in my glasses for contacts and had just "a little bit" of
plastic surgery done on my eyes. My husband griped that we could
have used that money to fix up the house. I told him I was the
one sitting in front of the computer 12 hours a day and I would
spend my money as I pleased.
Now months later I'm thin, toned and tanned; I look and feel
"drop-dead" gorgeous. Of course, no one has noticed because I
spend 12 hours a day in front of the computer.
P.S. My only regret is that my husband is not here to see the
"new me." He left me seven months ago...
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“how internet marketing made me ‘drop-dead’ gorgeous!”
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