|
Home::Career
5 Simple Strategies for Keeping Your Life Stuck
Author : Mary Ann Bailey
One of the most common statements I hear when I talk with potential clients is, "I feel stuck." People find themselves feeling stuck in different ways. They may be in a relationship that no longer is working, but they don't know how to leave. They may have a dream of starting their own business, but aren't exactly sure where to begin. Or they may just want to incorporate more fun in their lives, but aren't sure how to make that happen.
The feeling of being stuck is very familiar for most of us. Even though our lives seem to be in constant motion, very little of that motion actually moves us forward. We are similar to a log-jam in a river. The river is rushing all around us, but we aren't going anywhere. Why is it so easy for us to lose life's flow? What is it about the way we live our lives that leads us towards "stuck"?
There are probably many answers to these questions. In this article I will talk about 5 of the most common behaviors I see that hold us back from living the lives we really want to live.
Believing What You Think
The average mind has about 60,000 thoughts a day and most of us believe about 99% of what we think. Some of our thoughts are a product of how we were raised and the culture in which we live. Others are the product of our mind synthesizing our observations into our own brilliant deductions about the world. Our thoughts help us make sense of our world and our life so it is only logical that we hold our thoughts to be the truth.
This, however, is where we can get into trouble. We cling to beliefs that no longer may serve us. How many of you know for certain that you are not good at art, sports, or math. Most of us didn't leave elementary school without having gotten some negative feedback in at least one of these three areas.
What beliefs are you still hanging onto that may be keeping your life stuck? What things do you think you could never do? What things shouldn't be the way they are? Who would be very upset if you were to follow your heart? It might be time to examine your belief system and see what thoughts are holding you hostage in your life.
Blaming Others for Our Circumstances
How often have you heard comments such as, "My manager is such a jerk. No wonder I am having trouble doing my job." Or, "Don't blame me. I didn't make that decision!"
We all have things in our lives that are not going as well as we would like. That is just the way life is. It throws us curve balls and our job is to figure out the best way to deal with them. Some people defer to curve balls. They remove themselves from the batter's box and wait for a pitch they like better. Meanwhile, life continues on and after a while these people find themselves still standing outside the batter's box feeling stuck and stalled in their life.
Another approach would be to step up to the plate and give that curve ball your best shot. Realize that you are the only one who can truly take charge of the situation. What would it take for you to hit that ball? A good place to start would be putting together a game plan that included intention, determination, and lots of practice. You might not hit the first few pitches. But eventually you will get your timing and swing down and you will start knocking those balls out of the park. You will begin to see that the more you step into your life, the less stuck you will feel.
Taking Life (and Yourself) Too Seriously
Most of us were raised to believe that the key to success was hard work. Recently that belief has been revised to include hard work and very long hours. I would like to challenge that belief with another old adage: "All work and no play makes Jack/Jill a dull person."
To keep our lives flowing we need to intersperse fun, laughter, and creativity with our work. We need to be able to take time to enjoy and reenergize ourselves without feeling guilty or irresponsible. It is during these times of rest and fun that our minds are free to dream and imagine. This is when we very often come up with solutions to our problems, new ways to hit life's curves balls, and new strategies to enliven and enrich ourselves.
Living Life from the Middle
One of the easiest ways to keep our life stuck is to live it from the middle rather than closer to the edge. Living life from the middle means to remain safely in your comfort zone. It means to do things the same way, avoiding change at all costs, and eliminating all spontaneity from your life. As boring as this may sound, it is the way a majority of people live. And, as a result, the middle is an extremely crowded place and it is very easy to feel stuck when you are there.
By encouraging yourself to take small, yet consistent, steps toward the "edge" you will find that life has much more room in which to move around. And the edge is not as scary as you might think. As you begin to try new things, new perspectives will open up and you will begin to see more possibilities and opportunities. You will meet people who are also stepping outside their comfort zone and who can be supportive in your journey. As your life begins to open and flow, you will wonder how you ever stood living in the middle.
Falling Prey to the Fear of the Unknown
Fear is a powerful emotion. It protects us and keeps us from doing dangerous things, yet it can also keep us from doing new and wonderful things. Most of us get a little nervous when we are not sure about what is around the corner. Yet, sometimes getting our life unstuck takes a leap of faith and a strong belief that fear really does just stand for: False Evidence Appearing Real".
Have you always dreamed about starting your own business, becoming a sculptor, or sailing around the world? To give any chance to those dreams coming true you must face the fears that are holding you back head on and put your trust in you and your dream. Will you be successful? Maybe yes, maybe no. But at least you have opened the door to the possibility of your dream coming true. If you let yourself get frozen by the fear of the negative things that might happen and never open that door, you will have no chance of realizing your dream and you will always be left with the question of what could have been.
Our lives, like rivers, will always experience a few log-jams. The issue is not whether we get stuck. The issue is how we get ourselves extricated from the jam and get our lives flowing again. Becoming more aware of which behavior patterns are responsible for keeping us stuck is a great place to start that process.
About the Author
Mary Ann Bailey, MC, is a life coach who works with people who are feeling stuck or out of sync in their lives. She specializes in helping professional women who are struggling with midlife career changes. Visit her website at: http://www.baileycoaching.com for free articles and resources that will help you get your life moving forward in the direction you want.
Spam emails More free articles Related articles
|
More related feeds |
Go On An Inexpensive Cruise - Your Life May Depend On It
With all the cruise lines pouring money into new ships, they’ll be making deals to recoup their investments. Keep your eyes open and you’re sure to find highly affordable vacations to exciting destinations onboard one of these new, ...Dr. Van K Tharp Series: Stopy Worrying Yourself Out of Profits
If you can discover how you worry, then a simple solution to the problem is to do something else. If the new solution doesn’t work, then again do something else. Keep changing your approach until you find something that does work. ... Divorce 101
Fine-tune your game plan. Work on strategy. Keep it simple. Don't forget, ALWAYS HAVE A CONTINGENCY PLAN for everything (Plan B) Get your financial house in order. Clean out/close out everything, especially joint accounts. ... The 3 P’s To Organization
That is your goal and in order to reach this goal you will have to make some tough decisions about which box to place your belongings. Keep asking yourself while you are purging and get stuck on what to do with something, ... Stop Selling Yourself For Pennies - (MRR)
I say it's priceless because it can literally save you from financial ruin, and keep your IM hopes alive. When you sell a service you... Get paid straight to your PayPal account, upfront- instant cash baby! ... Secret #3 – Stop Beating Yourself Up
Remember, if you can’t get out of your story and get to the core of what is keeping you stuck, be sure to ask for support. Until you release the fear – you are inhibited by it and then you can’t have all that you truly desire in life. ... Threading Some Trends Together
How the Creative Economy Is Making Where to Live the Most Important Decision of Your Life, is so timely. For a little more trend connection, throw in a little bit of Seth Godin from May (this has stuck with me since then). ... Just ASK… Boost Your Business
Are you ’stuck’ in this area? Send me your most pressing question, then join me for our monthly ‘Ask Jack Canfield’ Tele-Clinic on Wednesday, July 2nd! www.AskJackCanfield.com. If you missed previous issues of Success Strategies, I keep ... Undead Strategies
for 110 mana you can do as much as 5 level 2 coil damage equivalent. CL/DK might work as well. Impale giving your ghouls time to deal lots of damage while the units are stunned. Unit groups: Keep your heroes and ghouls in 1 group and ... Creating Your Dream Life: Your Thinking Style
The thoughts that run through your head are either helping you to get what you want, or are keeping you from your potential. An important way to optimize your life is by making the most of your thinking. Below you will find five ...
|
|
|
